For several years I've taken a full month away from social media as a brain break, a reprieve from dissociative scrolling, self comparison, and anxiety. This year, however, I'm trying something a little different- a season of boredom. Starting this September, I'm trying to get bored. I'm not filling the silence. I'm not keeping my hands busy. I'm encouraging my mind to wander.
Boredom is a rare delicacy these days. And I mean true boredom - not dissatisfaction with what you have at your fingertips, or the lackluster haze of depression. When is the last time you were bored - with nothing to do, nothing new to watch or listen to? Remember the halcyon days of the summer doldrums? Those of us with pre-internet childhoods had no idea that boredom would one day be an endangered resource.
I have a very clear delineation in my life of before smart phone, after smart phone. When I left for Peace Corps, a couple of people I knew had iPhones. When I came back 27 months later, everyone I knew had one. In the last 11 years since I returned from Indonesia, my daily rhythms have radically changed since the before times. Honestly, my day is suffused with stimulation to a point that I'm kind of embarrassed to admit. Eating a meal feels challenging without a phone scroll, a tv show, or a podcast as accompaniment.
This time last year I was in the mountains for a yoga therapy training where we were asked to spend the morning in silence till 9 AM - that meant silently getting ready in the shared bathroom, silent morning yoga practice, silent breakfast, silent sitting and waiting for training to start. The trainer even suggested we limit eye contact!!!!!! Which felt almost impossible for me, someone raised to compulsively greet everyone I passed.
I discovered a lot of potency, however, in that act of drawing inwards, of thinking vs speaking. I left my phone in my room at 6 AM and didn't see it again until the evening. It allowed me to question certain habits and patterns - were they rooted in me, or were they shaped by constant input?
Limiting stimulation is a counterculture skill. In a culture that is powered by the scarcity - consumption ouroboros, filled with highly skilled marketing algorithms just drooling to show you what you're missing, limiting your reactivity to stimulation is like pulling the plug on the whole shady circus. Capitalism hates this one weird trick - being ok being bored.
We have to teach ourselves that quiet is safe. Many of us have filled the quiet with stimulation as a coping mechanism when things were scary or out of control. That makes sense. The question is - are you safe now, but living in a pattern still shaped by the unsafe past? This isn't a change that happens overnight. Long patterns of danger and trauma take a long time to unwind, I'm sorry to say. It starts, though, with asking questions.
Boredom allows for greater self reflection and discernment, something we sorely need in a culture shaped by people putting their "inside thoughts" on a screen for all the people and bots of the internet to pick apart into endless discourse. Boredom is the generative primordial stew of creativity. They're called shower epiphanies for a reason!! Our brains, nervous systems, bodies need this unspooled time to sort, connect, and process. How are you inviting boredom into your life this season?